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Architecture Presentation Crits
27 May 2006 | Category: Architecture Humour
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Image Source : Archinet
Here are some of the best comments by lecturers and professors I’ve come across, most of these quotes are from online blogs reading (archinet), some are from words of mouth while others are first hand experience, read also the second part of presentation crits 02, here goes:
- “Why are you here? Don’t come back next semester.”
- “Here’s a quarter. go call your mom and tell her you’re not going to be an architect.”
- Your design is like masturbation, you want to know why? That is because only you yourself enjoyed and like it.
- What is that boxy thing (model)? A coffin?
- Your design sucks!
- Your design is very tasteful… … for the tasteless.
- “Is this a … structural… glob of glue?”
- “When I went to school, at a different school than this one, there were students who would present projects like this one.
And they would fail.” - “Your project looks like something that’s been through a trash compactor”
- “This space that you’ve designed is the type place where beggars and dogs go to die”
- “Are you in interior design?”
- “Why are you studying architecture if you’re producing things like that?”
- “Hey, everyone, gather round this project, come in close…because this is a great example for everyone of exactly what NOT to do..”
- “This drawing isn’t worth the paper it is printed on.”
- “This (model) is great…..just don’t let your dog play with it next time.”
- “The program you invented was meant solely for your architectural masturbation……”
- If you build this and after 10000 years the aliens see it, they would understand why humans extinguish
- “Have you ever considered a career in accounting?”
- “oh, so it’s like some kind of orgy pit!”
- “So your parents are pay $20000 a year for this.”
- “Your theory is bullshit. You don’t need that”
- Prof pointing to part of a model, “Did you chew this?”
Tags: Architect Presentation, Architecture Crits, Architecture Presentation, corporate presentation, presentation skills, presentation techniques, presentation training
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28 Comments
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Blake Habshey
on September 30th, 2007My lecturer said: “You should go straight to Poultry Science”.
mirage
on October 21st, 2007we had an interim before crit and the tutor told one of my classmates “can we PLEASE move on to something that actually looks like it took some time to create! …instead of something that looks like a glob of play-doh that has be rolled in your hands!” (referring to her model)
Kennan
on November 29th, 2007Someone in my studio was told, “I don’t know whether to cry or strangle you right now” in his final crit.
Manuj Darshan
on December 18th, 2007On being 40 minutes late. “You are too early for the next class.”
Oskar Arnarson
on March 17th, 2008I remember from one critique where my classmate was presenting his project and one of the teachers stood up and gave a 5 minute speech on how wrong and uninteresting the project was.
Then someone pointed out..
“Ahm.. That’s not his project.. Yeah, you’re looking at the wrong project”
She turned over to the right project and replied hastly:
“Well this isn’t any different. The same thing applies”
This was followed up by an awkward silence
gti
on April 22nd, 2008a classmate of mine while presenting climatic analysis for his urban design project was told “the issues of the city are greater than sunpath”
PLYMOUTH
on April 27th, 2008MY TUTOR ARE LANDSCAPE DESIGNER AND TEACHING ARCHITECTURE… WHEN I ASK HIM SUMTHING AFTER COMPLAINING/CRIT ABOUT THE BUILDING REGULATION AND HE END UP SAYING.
“YOU ARE THE ARCHITECT..YOU FIGURE OUT”
jess
on April 29th, 2008In a crit a classmate had designed a home for a burlesque dancer…. she had good pictures but poor cad work and was told-
“Is those visuals are burlesque, your plans are gimp.”
Iftikhar Sajid
on May 15th, 2008Amazing …! Crit i came across:
“This is a field where those people comes who have broad mind……..not a narrow minded …….like someone i read that he will go to [poultry science]“
Kien
on May 30th, 2008Forget all these crits. We all know that cruel crits come from bad teachers.Who might received the same thing when they were students, and try to throw it to someone else.U are way better than what they say.
kaliko
on June 11th, 2008My lecturer looked at a model i made and proclaimed it looked like a demented dog eating cheese!!
Dana
on June 13th, 2008Good thing you said there Kien!!!
Wim
on June 19th, 2008A teacher at my uni said the following thing to a classmate of me:
“Who sketched that, your ten year old sister?”
metabalcanico
on July 5th, 2008Lecturer slapping my friend’s face…
renie
on September 1st, 2008my friend told my classmate designs… ” what are this many boxes? is this a cementery?”
my mentor told me my son in grade 3 can draw better than yours…
Liezl
on September 23rd, 2008hectic. ive sat through some bad ones but the above take the cake. a lecturer did tell my classmate once “nice process sketches. pity you didn’t do your presentation”…. it WAS his final presentation. shame.
hafizi
on October 24th, 2008i still remember my lecturer said to my friend during crit session~~~~ ‘ur design look like shit, and ur face look like shit’…
ArchiCam
on December 7th, 2008One of my professors told a girl last year that there are easier majors, like leisure studies. . . she isn’t around anymore.
Monali
on December 23rd, 2008in our first year we had to design a 100 sqft. flying saucer. The Professor looking at one of the models, studying it carefully said, ” lets see how it flies” and it just went out of window. That was our first assignment in design and we thought that was one of the best designs.
Rani
on January 12th, 2009harsh!! are there any tips on surviving such brutal conditions?????
MAB
on February 3rd, 2009Fraid not Rani, you could come back with a smart reply like i did once but you’ve got to remember, they will just crush you harder next time (as they did to me)
But i survived, got a good 1st class BA(Hons) now doing my MA, (at the same place) there not too harsh now cos they know what i can produce, they still like to try and push very hard.
ezade
on February 12th, 2009arrrrrrrrrrrgh again-again-again…………………………………………………what da crit……….
Jacolien
on February 19th, 2009My lecturer stood up in the middle of my crit, in the middle of my sentence and just walked away…very VERY akward!
Paul
on March 26th, 2009A girl in my crit was told the best part of her project was her scale figure…she then replied, “really?” in disbelief…awkward.
Pedro
on April 19th, 2009My 1st year professor told us that some crits just like to hear themselves talk, so don’t take it too seriously and let them look like the asses they are. Eventually you’ll learn how to deal with them.
Bruno
on June 7th, 2009A Prof (friend of mine) talking about a D4 student project: This is like what would look like if Ghery chewed crayons and vomited all over.
By far the best ive heard!
Frenz
on June 24th, 2009I’ve heard this one:
Your design is so provincial, there could be a new modernist movement as reaction to your work.
She was the only one ever saying this about this project… So never care and just smile and think about the beer afterwards; you really earned it!
damola
on August 29th, 2009i guess this crit cruelty is worldwide!! studied archy in Nigeria n one crit says to my classmate whose tryn to explain his concept “u ve FAILED, dont bother” n just walks away.